It is estimated that it causes 25% of workplace problems like absenteeism, lower productivity, and excessive medical benefits use to the tune of more than $5.8 billion annually. Seventy eight percent of all Human Resource Directors recognize it as a substantial employee problem.  It costs corporate America $1.8 billion in lost productivity. Eight million man days of paid work and 5.6 million man days of household work are lost annually.

It is the largest cause of injury to middle aged women but it happens to men as well. It is estimated that between 3.3 million and 10 million children see it annually. Twenty two percent of middle class divorces are caused by it.

It affects every fabric of our society-it knows no limits. It is also estimated that nearly 50 percent of all suspected cases go unreported.

But I guess domestic violence in America is really not that important or cost enough in economic or social terms or you would hear more about it. I mean after all is said and done ninety percent of family violence defendants are never prosecuted.

One out of three women report some form of physical or sexual abuse in their lives most often a member of her own family. Maybe that’s not enough. Every year four to six million cases of physical violence occur in intimate relationships. Maybe that’s not enough. And remember only fifty percent of cases are reported.

Police respond differently to domestic violence calls than to other calls. Women in jail for a killing in a domestic disturbance get sentenced an average of 15 years while men get an average of 2-6 years. In 1990 there were 3800 animal shelters and 1500 shelters for battered women.

Why is there such a double standard or no standard? Indeed it is a very complicated issue that we are not going to solve today right here and now. But the laws on domestic violence need to change, society’s view of the problem has to change, and until that happens domestic violence as we know it will continue to flourish and grow.

In the meantime women would be well advised to be prepared and consider what to do in an emergency. There are a multitude of resources on the local, state and federal level available, but in the end it is going to fall on your shoulders to arm yourself with the tools for self defense or survival.

Those tools might include developing some knowledge of warning signs; learning some techniques on self defense; carrying some non-lethal self defense weapons; developing a workplace and personal safety plan. Don’t rely on someone else. You are the one that will make a difference!

Domestic violence between couples is quiet common and most of theTimes the victims are women, although several such violence could also be extended in the direction of step-children. In such cases, the law of certain rights, looks to be discussed here. Dealing with these situations alone is not advisable, but you should contact your local domestic violence advocate and family counseling.

Such steps could be very useful in repairing your relationship, but if you think that the reason for such violent threats that your spouse has amental disorder or disease of some kind, or the mere fact that he / she enjoys giving these threats, and it is difficult for you to prevent or control them, then it is better for you to take legal advice provided by your state or district lawyer to take domestic violence.- Felony lawyer

The most important means in the law for such behavior is the protection order or an injunction that orders to keep offenders away from the victim. The injunction is the perpetrator to stayaway from the apartment of the victim, at home or at work, and it could take on a larger scale and thus a separation and have some distance to hold perpetrators, say 100 meters or 1 km, etc. If an offender is found violating this order , then he / she may for the debt that a criminal act is charged as such. Even if the offender struck the victim, he / she could be charged with more offenses such as assault or battery.- Felony lawyer

The question you might want to ask that whether theProtective or restrictive to be useful in such situations. These orders are very useful in many situations, as for the arrest and conviction of the perpetrators themselves, so they act as a deterrent to the offender and the mere thought of to be arrested or sent to prison so that prevents them from such actions in the future. In some cases, these commands can add to prevent the anger and not the perpetrators. In such cases, the perpetrators, rather than trying to change his / her own behavior increasesto avenge the violence. The law may provide some degree of security even in such cases, but there is no guarantee perfect that stop the perpetrators act in this way. READ MORE http://www.felonylawyer.pannipa.com/2009/09/18/domestic-violence-attorney-when-you-need-one/

Maybe it’s a certain ethnic or income group. It could also be a group whose educational background is not as extensive as say for instance the talk show host doing the interviewing.

Statistics which can be an indicator or just a snapshot in time can also “confirm” that domestic violence is almost exclusive to one group or another.
 
Impressions are one thing; reality is another. Lynn Woolsey found that out. Ms Woolsey is a
Congressional representative for California’s sixth district: “I represent an affluent district, but when I worked to form my county’s first battered-women’s shelter, some nights there were no beds left. Violence against women crosses all economic lines.”

As well as color lines, ethnic lines and educational lines. It could care less where you live, what exclusive clubs you do or do not belong to, where your kids go to school or the type of car you drive.

That’s because domestic violence is not about society as a whole. Of course the environment you grew up in can have an impact on your behavior but all too frequently it becomes the primary measuring stick.

Therefore it can come as a shock to some of us when we find out couples that live in a poor neighborhood with extremely limited educational backgrounds have been happily married for countless years and have
never experienced one instance of domestic violence.

Meanwhile married couples who are at the other end of the scale are domestic violence personified.

This is not to say that it cannot affect one group or another disproportionately. It is to say however in the final analysis domestic violence comes down to the interaction of two individuals regardless of what district they live in.

Are You Searching For A Criminal Lawyer Experienced in Criminal Domestic Violence Cases in NJ ?

Be Sure To Hire A West Windsor, NJ Criminal Lawyer With Experience
Handling Domestic Violence Cases

Are you facing criminal domestic violence charges in New Jersey? If so, it is important for you to fully understand just how serious these charges are.

 In fact, depending upon your specific situation, you may be facing simple assault or even aggravated assault charges, both of which can result in hefty fines, community service and even imprisonment. Therefore, it is essential for you to hire a criminal lawyer in NJ who is experienced with handling criminal domestic violence cases. By doing so, you will have the best chance of getting the charges against you reduced, or possibly even dropped.

If you are facing aggravated assault charges, a skilled criminal lawyer with expertise in defending criminal domestic violence cases in NJ may be able to get the charges substantially reduced.

According to New Jersey law, you may be found guilty of simple assault if you…

Attempt to cause bodily injury to someone else Cause bodily injury to someone with a deadly weapon due to negligence Attempt to threaten someone with serious bodily injury

If you have been charged with aggravated assault, on the other hand, you face the possibility of being found guilty of…

Attempting to cause serious bodily injury to someone Causing injury to someone in a way that demonstrates an indifference toward the value of human life Attempting to cause bodily injury with a deadly weapon Recklessly causing bodily injury to someone else with a deadly weapon Pointing a firearm at someone else, whether it is loaded or not Causing bodily injury to someone else while fleeing from the law Causing bodily injury to someone by starting a fire or causing an explosion

Since the actions that are considered to be aggravated assault are more serious than those considered to simple assault, you would be looking at much stiffer penalties if you are found guilty of aggravated assault.

Therefore, you want to be certain to hire a criminal lawyer experienced with i domestic violence cases n NJ who will do everything possible to get your charges reduced — or to get the charges dropped completely.

At the same time, since a domestic violence case typically involves sensitive family issues, you also want to be sure to hire a West Windsor, NJ criminal lawyer who understands the special considerations that go into a domestic violence case. In order to make certain you get a fair trial and that you get the best representation possible, hire a West Windsor, NJ criminal lawyer with experience in domestic violence cases.

In healthcare, it’s the psychologists and psychiatrists. These healthcare providers are frequently manipulated by abusers to aid them in establishing false claims about the domestic abuse survivors that they batter and control.

Psychiatric Diagnosis as Batterer’s Club in Domestic Violence Divorce

Almost daily, I am sought out by a domestic violence survivor seeking help from being falsely accused of being mentally ill. In many of the cases, the mental healthcare diagnostics appear to be grossly improper.

But that doesn’t prevent a court from making determinations about the accused. In many of these cases, the battered mothers (and abused fathers) are faced with losing custody of and, in some cases, even the essential moments of simple human contact with their children.

Once judicial decisions are made, remedies can be added on and on, with no regard for the accuracy of the original foundation underlying the initial judicial decision. We have seen domestic violence victims prevented from having unsupervised or any access to their abused children because of a clinical psychiatric diagnosis.

The sad thing here is that those directly negatively impacted, like the protective parent and children, are unaware of this ploy during its set-up and ultimate execution. Often they go along with certain procedures trusting in their sanity and hoping for justice to prevail. Then, the day comes when they awaken to the fact that they have been re-victimized by their abuser’s manipulation of the psychologists and psychiatrists.

Psychiatric Re-victimization To What End

Now you’d think that if the batterer is getting a divorce and seeking to move on with their lives, then the victim’s declared mental health status would be of no interest to him/her. Wrong…completely wrong!

By establishing for “the record” that the domestic violence survivor is “crazy,” the abuser leverages their ability to regain and maintain control over the family…and most importantly, control over themselves, or at least control over their public image. Many people will tell you that the legal psychiatrics of a case are nothing more than to save face for the batterer.

The abuser seeks to walk away looking good and certainly not being an abuser. To this end, they must make the victim to be “bad”…”wrong”…”crazy.” Essentially, the abuser enlists (directly or indirectly) the healthcare provider to discredit the victim in order to invalidate who she/he is and what she/he stands for with respect to being a domestic abuse survivor.

If you are a domestic violence survivor and have been threatened with losing custody of your children and the credibility of you mental health status, seek to understand how batterers manipulate healthcare providers to establish false claims. And as you learn about the reality of what’s before you, find a credible professional to help you prevent this life-changing destructive legal psychiatric ploy. The sooner you become proactive in preventing the establishment of false claims, the easier you can prevent them from defining your life and limiting your liberties.

Men who kill their pregnant partners in cold blood are pure unadulterated evil in human form. There are no two ways about this. About 20 per cent of pregnant women who died during their pregnancy were murdered by an intimate partner.

I had to read this a number of times to let it sink in, because it seems so unbelievable that there were that many men in relationships, who were capable of killing their partner and their unborn child. It is no longer an isolated or rarest of rare cases; it is endemic.

According to the Washington Post about 1,300 pregnant women were killed by their partner during the 14 year period from 1990 – 2004, which means about 1300 men were able to turn around and snuff the life out of someone they were supposed to have loved the most.

Domestic violence statistics provide compelling evidence to this horrible fact.

What is even more demonic than this fact is the lenient sentences they get based on pleas such as spur-of-the-moment impulse, insane rage, provoked beyond endurance, jealous rage, and similar fairy tales that judges seem to lap up like hungry street dogs lap up three day old meat.

We have heard plenty about how they do it. Let us try to figure out why they do it. Are all men potential spouse murderers? Don’t they all have the same hormones and drives? These are basic questions that crop up.

No, men are not natural born killers. Even men who have issues such as growing up amidst scenes of domestic violence, consume alcohol, are physically aggressive with other males, pick fights in bars, are into physical sport such as boxing and wrestling, et cetera, do not compulsorily turn their violent tendencies on their partners. In fact there are men who tone down considerably in the presence of their loved ones.

So who are the men who do it, and what prompts them? These would be the sick psychopaths who are totally self-centered, unemotional, and incapable of empathy. You can recognize some traits in them such as a tendency to be pathological liars, an elevated sense of self, sociopathic in the extreme.

These tendencies only get stronger and deeper with time and cannot be changed by you.

Recent studies in genetics have pointed to certain physical characteristics that may be indications of cruelty and unemotional behavior. According to this, men with short thick necks, short arms, and hands in relation to the rest of their body, may possess the ability to exhibit cruelty. Now this is may be refuted by advanced studies, but for defenseless women clutching at straws, it may prove useful to keep this in mind. Use your own powers of observation. Check out domestic violence news and pictures of spouse murderers such as Bobby Cutts Jr. and others and see if this proves to be valid.

These men are not able to think of or care about anyone. Even when they have caused hurt to another, they can only talk about how inconvenienced they have been by the whole episode. A pregnancy is for them, a major inconvenience.

What is the happiest moment of a healthy man’s life is for these freaks a disruption that should be ended, a wrong move that has to be corrected. If it means killing the woman and the baby it is as big a deal as running over the neighbor’s dog while rushing to meet an important appointment.

He might not be upset about it in any major way, except be inconvenienced and annoyed as if he were forced to mow the lawn, when all he wanted was to hang in the hammock all day for the rest of his life. Everything in his life including the woman is there for his convenience-the car is not supposed to break down, the woman is not supposed to get pregnant, it is not supposed to rain on his picnic, period.

Steer clear, my friends, steer clear of he who does not think you are important; who thinks you can be won over easily with charm, flowers, and flashy objects; who hurts you happily and doesn’t regret it; who comes onto you while still with another woman or just fresh from a break up.

Before he starts exerting physical pressure and violence on you, he’ll do it verbally and emotionally.

If he compels you verbally to do things you do not want to, take it as a warning and beware.

Domestic violence and murder are not too far away for these men. Do not hang around for it to get better, it won’t.

Domestic violence law is a very complex field. Many a lawyer specializes in this field as those facing these charges oftentimes don’t understand that they’ve crossed a line and, oftentimes, they don’t understand why they’re being prosecuted on a domestic violence charge at all. Understanding these laws requires that one understand that they are based around the limits of acceptable behavior between couples which have either an intimate relationship or couples who have a common child. These limits extend to far more than battery and other crimes of physical violence.

Domestic violence law includes terroristic threats. These are the sort of threats that carry with them the possibility of real action against the victim. Threats of violence, damage to one’s reputation or to one’s children are all acts which can add to a domestic violence case. Where there are weapons in a home where police answer a domestic violence call, these sorts of threats empower the police to remove any weapons from the home, including the homeowner’s firearms. They are also empowered to separate the couple to prevent any violence from being visited upon either partner. What one says has real weight in these cases.

Domestic violence laws also cover stalking activity. Stalking essentially means making any harassing or unwanted contact. When an individual is told that they should make no more contact with a partner, they will do well to heed that admonition. Following individuals to work, hanging around their house when not invited, making phone calls which have been identified as unwanted and making any attempt to be involved in the life of an individual who has specified that they want to be left alone are all acts that can be construed as stalking and may be used to make the prosecution’s case.

A great deal of avoiding domestic violence charges has to do with understanding limits. One should not keep calling their spouse, lover or partner if they’ve been told to back off. One should also never cross the boundary of approaching their intimate partner in their workplace or in other public places if they’ve been told to stay away. Many individuals who face these charges have not committed an actual act of violence as it’s commonly understood but have crossed other lines of behavior which run contrary to the law. Understanding one’s limits can help avoid problems with domestic violence law.

The Grants to Reduce Domestic Violence, Dating Violence, Sexual Assault, and Stalking on Campus Program popularly known as Campus Program is delineated with the motive to encourage and strengthen higher education institutions to endorse responses in a comprehensive and coordinated manner to reduce the said violence often faced by young girls.

Campuses in alliance with local civil, legal or criminal justice agencies and nonprofit victim advocacy organizations, which are community based, should espouse those policies and protocols that consider any act of violence against women as a grim misdemeanor. They should also establish victim service programs that assure safety of victim, offender’s accountability and the deterrence of such crimes.

No doubt, many campuses have initiated to develop campus-based responses such as campus law enforcement, campus victim services, campus administration, student organizations, housing authorities, health services and disciplinary boards to address violent crimes against women but the need is to address the latent causes of violence against women by establishing programs that delve to bring about change in attitudes and beliefs that allow and encourage such unaccepted behavior.

Colleges and universities need to exhibit through their protocols, policies and actions that any form of violence against women will not be tolerated and it constitutes crime with serious legal consequences.

Higher education institutions under the Higher Education Amendments of 1998 are eligible to apply for this grant program. The Office on Violence Against Women is responsible for administering this grant and particularly supports those projects which are submitted by Tribal Colleges and Universities, Historically Black Colleges and Universities, Universities and Colleges serving primarily populations of Latino or Hispanic and Universities and Colleges based in the territories of Puerto, Guam, Northern Mariana Islands, Virgin Islands and American Samoa.

The higher education institutions applying this grant should put forward proposal of the activities that should be at least implemented such as creation of a coordinated community response or multidisciplinary response to violence against women on campus involving entire campus and community where it is located. Campuses seeking grant should also forge partnerships with minimum one local nonprofit and nongovernmental victim advocacy organization and one or more civil legal or criminal justice agencies.

There is a need to regularly review the policies, procedures and protocols of member organizations by coordinated campus and community response teams. These institutions should also constitute a mandatory prevention and education program for all incoming students on violence against women in teamwork with campus and community-based victim advocacy organizations.

Campus police should be trained to effectively deal with the above said cases and along with it programs to train members of disciplinary boards on campus should also be strengthened to effectively deal with the charges of violence against women. Overall, all those programs, policies and strategies should be adopted and implemented that can efficaciously handle violence against women on campus.

For detailed information regarding this grant program and its set standards, Office on Violence Against Women (OVW) in Washington can be contacted at 202-307-6026.

Domestic Violence Story – Chapter Two

Things seemed to calm down, and he even “allowed” my friends to come over to our place for the first time in the 6 months we had been living together. I wanted things to go so well, I worked very hard to get the food and drinks ready and cleaned diligently.

My boyfriend was a recovering alcoholic and was clean and sober for 7 years. When my friends arrived, I served the drinks. He said he didn’t want one, but I said it was okay for him to have just one. I didn’t want him to feel awkward or left out.

Okay, you get it, right? That’s where I messed up. And having no previous knowledge of what a serious alcoholic was about and thought having a couple drinks wouldn’t be such a big deal, I certainly learned my lesson.

(It took 3 days for my eye to open just to see if I was blind from the injury. There was cornea damage, the thank The Lord, I still had my sight.)

I served everyone drink after drink that night, and everyone, including my boyfriend, had a fantastic time!

When everyone was walking out the door was left open, and I noticed my dog, Pebbles, got out. We lived right on a main road, and I was frantic and asked him to get Pebbles right away. I can’t recall what his reply was, but he didn’t go outside to look, so I said it again, “Pebbles got out, we need to get her now!”

I was cleaning all the beer bottles up all over the coffee table, and I was standing right next to the couch. All I remember is being thrown into the couch on my back and held down. His knee was pushed down on my chest and one of his hands was squeezing my arm. I couldn’t move at all.

Then it began. What seemed to last hours probably only lasted a solid 60 seconds and about 20 or more punches. I will never forget one punch, it sent my eyeball crashing right into my head! It hurt so badly, I thought my eye was gone. I felt my eye being shoved so hard into my brain it was brutal.

(This was taken more than 2 weeks after the incident.)

But he didn’t stop. I weighed 115 pounds and was 5′ 6″ tall. Hardly a match for a guy, even though he was shorter than I was.

The punches to my face, neck and chest continued. I remember saying “I’m sorry, please forgive me. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Please. I love you.”

Then he stopped suddenly! He took a beer bottle and broke it over his head. (A sudden rush of guilt came to his mind? Who knows!)

No time for making up or worrying about HIS head, I ran as fast as I could out of the apartment!

I ran to the convenience store area which was in our parking lot. Apparently the store owner saw me bleeding and yelling for help and called 911.

At just that moment, all of my friends came back and looked at me like they saw a ghost. Only about 15 minutes passed by since they left. It turns out they took my dog, Pebbles, as a joke. It didn’t turn out to be so funny though. But she was okay, so I was VERY relieved about that! She was my pride and joy! If you seriously want unconditional love, animals don’t let you down! ) So I won’t let them down, that’s for sure.

My Pebbles…I got her when she was 5 weeks old. She fit in the palm of my hand. We were together for 17 years, some of the best years of my life. I was very blessed to have her love in my life.

Please See Domestic Violence Story Chapter 3

To show or not to show? To share or not to share? After deliberating, it was a no brainer for me to show other women (and men), just SOME of what I have been through. Yes, a picture tells a thousand words. But why did it happen? What did “I” do to cause it? Was there any domestic violence prevention that could have been done? Why did he do this? Many women ask these same questions.

Sometimes there are absolutely NO “logical” reasons why things happen. Sometimes there are logical reasons. But none of them make us physically, emotionally, or mentally feel any better after they happen.

Was this the only time? Well, I would love to tell you it was. But that wouldn’t be the truth. And the truth is why we are all here, right? To find the truth and seek our own solutions to get out.

Were there red flags? In reflection, “Heck, yes!”

He was so nice at first. A gentleman, seriously. Then we moved in together. BIG mistake. By then, financially, times were difficult. A few months after we moved in, I was laid off from my job. The man who hired me kept me employed until his wife came back from pregnancy leave, then he let me go and she took over my position. He never mentioned his plan to only keep me until she returned.

The strain financially did not make my boyfriend happy. We started getting into disagreements. Then one night the yelling started. So I went into the bathroom and packed a bag to go and stay at my girlfriend’s house. Ahhh, THAT is when it started. He threw me across the bathroom and I hit my head on the sink and fell between the toilet and the sink to the floor. I remember staring at my legs and arms. They were not comfortable in the contorted position in which they landed. But I was in shock mostly that he so effortlessly pushed my chest and I literally flew across the bathroom.

Instead of hearing “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to do that!”, I heard, “You’re not f@#$ing going anywhere!” Obviously, I stayed home.

Please see Domestic Violence Story Chapter 2